Welcome to Maoist Orange Cake. Each week one of our Divas posts a thoughtful (but not necessarily serious) essay on whatever calls forth her Voice or strikes her Fancy. We invite you to join us wherever the discussion leads.
Motto of the MOC: Sincere, yes. Serious? Never!

"I would also like to add that ‘Maoist Orange Cake is possibly the best name for a blog ever. Just my twopence." -- The Sixth Carnival of Radical Feminists, 1 October 2007

The Twelfth Carnival of Radical Feminists is up at The Burning Times blog and mentions one of our posts, Helen 'Wheels' Keller, for recommendation. Orangeists spreading our zest!

Sunday, April 29, 2007


How many cards in a full deck?
How many weeks in a full year?
How many years in a full life?


Top Ten Things We Love About Shadocat:
10. Dinah thinks she has the COOLEST HANDLE evah.
9. She's not afraid to publicly show her emotions.
8. She's not afraid to publicly apologize. (See #9.)
7. She has red hair.
6. She reads. All the time, anything she can get her hands on. Takes it in, makes connections, says what she thinks. A writer couldn't ask for more.
5. She writes. All the time, in one form or another, really well and improving her craft all the time. Remember her name -- well, when you know her real name.
4. She is a really, really good mother.
3. She's played for both teams, and she chose MINE. (Gimme a D -- Gimme a Y -- Gimme a K -- ) (Okay, I know some of ya'll would argue this one the other way.)
2. She is holding down an outpost of love and clarity in the so-called "flyover states".
1. Still Ain't Satisfied!


Thursday, April 26, 2007

The Fremont Troll

In the Fremont neighborhood of Seattle, under the Aurora Avenue North bridge, is a large sculpture of a troll. He has one hubcap eye, and in his hand he grips a full-size Volkswagon beetle. This is his song.

lyrics copyright by Jana C. Hollingsworth
Tune: "My Grandfather's Clock" (slightly modified)

When you take a drive down Highway 99,
Beware when you come to the bridge.
Somewhere between Lake Union and the brine,
Somewhere beyond Phinney Ridge--
Beware! Beware! The Fremont Troll!
Underneath Aurora North you'll find his trollish hole.
He keeps an eye on traffic better than the State Patrol.
The Fre Mont Troll.

Peugeots, he reports, taste singularly fine,
And Volkswagon bugs make his day.
On Honda Accords he'll regularly dine,
And sometimes a rare Chevrolet.
Beware! Beware! The Fremont Troll!
Every auto moving he regards as rightful toll.
No race or nationality escapes his breakfast bowl.
The Fre Mont Troll.

Do not be too harsh upon a simple soul
Who noshes on Hyundai and Saab.
He's doing his part our traffic to control,
And doing a wonderful job.
Three cheers! Three cheers! The Fremont Troll!
The city of Seattle should commend him on the whole.
Eliminating gridlock is his amiable goal.
The Fre Mont Troll.
The Fre (clap clap) Mont (clap clap) Troll. (clap - clap)


Tuesday, April 24, 2007

How to Post a Picture

Okay Shadocat, I figured out how to post a picture. Here's how:

From the main page, click the tab on upper right, "New Post."
On the right hand side of the brown menu bar on top of the posting box (where you type in your post) is a pretty little turquoise rectangle "picture" icon. Click on it and you will see "add an image." You can "browse" to upload a photo file from your computer, OR on the right, you can upload a link from the Internet.

Hope this works for you!


The REAL Silvio Soprani

Hello Friends. This is a picture of my beautiful accordion from which I took my handle. My father bought this for me when I was 8 years old and I have been playing it on and off ever since.

It weighs a ton, but it is sparkly and it needs no amplication. The leather wrist strap (on my left, your right) is as old as the accordion. I imagine people who ride horses feel this same affection for their "tack" (isn't that what you call all the reins and saddles and everything?)

The shoulder straps wore out in the year 1998. I went to a leather crafter to replace them, but he did not use leather of equivolent quality, so they don't have as much soul as the originals.

Shadocat, I have figured out how to post a picture, but in order to recreate the sequence I would have to exit this post, so I will post it later.


it's national poetry month!!!

the month of may is nearly here,

(and i call myself a poet)

i'll hide at home, and drink a beer

because i didn't know it...

And Now for something completely different (and better!)

A Letter From Lesbia

... So, praise the gods, Catullus is away!

And let me tend you this advice, my dear:

Take any lover that you will, or may

,Except a poet. All of them are queer.

It's just the same- a quarrel or a kissIs but a tune to play upon his pipe.

He's always hymning that or wailing this;

Myself, I much prefer the business type.

That thing he wrote, the time the sparrow died-(Oh, most unpleasant- gloomy, tedious words!)

I called it sweet, and made believe I cried;

The stupid fool! I've always hated birds....

Dorothy Parker



This is just to thank Maggie for creating this environment. It feels very welcoming. I also just wanted to try to create a title using this feature. (I am on a slow learning curve!)



At last I have a dozen or so. Puny and small, and many plants aren't bothering to flower. But at last they are here!

I'm going to go dance among them.


Monday, April 23, 2007


I have managed to start a small diversion on the Blog Whose Name We Do Not Mention. Someone responded to my previous note when I mentioned going to the library on Sunday. It seems to me this should be a good starting point for us, so here it is. Have fun.

Not all Seattle’s libraries are open Sundays, but some branches (including my neighborhood, Ballard) are open Sunday afternoons. A lot of people go walking around downtown Ballard on Sundays, so it gets plenty of use. It’s brand new, and was designed to be environmentally friendly, including an ecosystem on the roof. My only real complaints are that the chairs are too low for the tables (you notice this when you’re 4′10″), and I had hoped it would have considerably more books than the old branch. It doesn’t. Here’s a link:


Those who have heard bad things about the new Seattle library are probably thinking of the new main library downtown. It is flashy outside, but inside it is both confusing and hideous. It could be a set for one of those science fiction movies about an inhuman industrial future. I can just see Harrison Ford creeping around the corners and by-ways with a ray-gun, blasting at mutants.

Jana C.H.
Saith JcH: Having enough books is like the speed of light– you can only approach it, never achieve it.


Bird S**t

I can't tell if the "bird/spring" post is still a happenin' thing on the place we dare not speak it's name (can't get it at the office) but I'm inspired by the season, so I offer you this...


The songs of the phoebes,
Don't really please me,
And when they're moulting,
They're pretty revolting.

(please don't haunt me, ogden nash)


A Day In May

I would just like to inform everyone that at three minutes and four seconds after 2 AM on the 6th of May this year, the time and date will be:

02:03:04 05/06/07

This will never happen again.

Just thought that was kinda kewl


Sunday, April 22, 2007


Since we've been dismissed as those who talk about cats and cakes, I thought, might as well. This is my current roommate, Dinah Samhain. She likes to sit on the OED over my computer, and if you look to her right you will see Ripley with a flamethrower, a small metal figure that goes with me to any reading or performance. Ripley is very reassuring. Dinah was born to a pregnant mama cat at the University of Texas who was part of Austin's feral cat rescue project. Dinah has her own e-mail and, despite English being a second language, manages to write phonetically well enough to get her emphatic points across. Her communiques are in demand. She is short-tempered and speaks at length about human oppressive attitudes. According to my godson, she also has her own indie rock band (all cats except for him) whose latest album is titled "The View from One Foot Two".


Saturday, April 21, 2007


Yes, I spell it peom, and it would take forever to explain why.

Here's mine, in honor of the daffodils hiding from me:

I wandered smelly as a fart
Because I had a broken heart.
I was too sad to bathe my skin,
And so infection did set in.
Infection then turned to necrosis
and everybody held their nosis.


no title, so there.

ok, I found it. does someone mind sending me my poem, since I forgot to save it for myself?


Choco bunnies

It may be a bit late but it fits re april, jokes, and subverting the dominant paradigm...


Friday, April 20, 2007

BEGINNING THE RECIPE -- by Maggie Jochild

This is a draft. This is ONLY a draft. I've discovered people are often most creative when they are given something to alter and polish -- blank canvases are intimidating to those who have been clobbered by certain educational or parenting practices. So, come along and put your oar in the water. Please.